i just finished a science 101 class, aka respiratory care sciences. the book was more about the application of certain theories and gas laws, and provided hardly any explanation on the laws themselves, so every one was lost, including my other teacher. he decides to give us a "surprise" for our final last thursday...
i get to class at 6 pm and am told that we are not allowed to take the final until 9 pm because then everyone bails on the remainder of class, and the teachers get in trouble from the evil president... so everyone is sitting sround bored to death, and at 9 he tells everyone to take out a piece of paper and write down the grade they think they will get on the test. "be honest!" i put 92%
then he says, "have a good night!" "go home!"
"wtf?!" aw, hell no i did not study for this test so i skip it! fuck that!
i say, "did you even make up a test?"
he says, "yeah, do you have any idea how many people would have failed my test if i gave it tonight?"
i say, "gimme the test." he throws his hands up.
so i waited for everyone to leave and took the test. it was funny, he complained about how he tried to be nice, and i'm never happy. he even said that he was going to scrap my grade and give me the score i get on the test, even if i fail it. i said that sounded like a good idea, because at least then i will have earned it. we had a good laugh over the scores everyone gave themselves..
i'm pretty sure i got a 100%
in the process of switching to days...
my clinical director, who i usually have in the evenings, is now my teacher in days. i don't know how he manages to have a life - he probably doesn't. he is much more tolerable, almost even likable, during the days. one of my good friends/classmates switched to days with me and we are looking forward to finishing school maybe 3 months early. highlights of class include:
"jugular" spelled "yugular"
"vomit" and "vapor" are "womit" and "wapor"
Medical air (filtered atmospheric air) is stored in "jello" tanks... he said this and i at first thought that he said perhaps "cell" or "gel" tanks? WTF? i look at my friend and she was watching me and busting up because she knew i'd get lost.
"did he just say 'jello' tanks?"
"no.. 'yellow' tanks..."
maintaining composure is something of a challenge when one is sitting in the front row, middle seat...
CO2 (carbon dioxide) is : "used for singulation, to dilate cerebral vessels (pronounced 'bessels') and in ECMO"...
CO2 is also: "produced by heating limestone in contact with water"... um, wouldn't it make more sense to heat the water and then make contact with the limestone? he was reading the powerpoint slideshow to us, and when he got to this factoid, i said,
"you know, in case we're ever out in the woods and need some carbon dioxide or something..."
could somebody PLEASE PLEASE give us some useless information in case our itty bitty brains aren't overloaded as it is?!
each class is started with a pep talk of some sort, and yesterday he was going on (for an hour, i kid you not...) about how if you have a felony on your record, you will not be able to get your rt certification. if you have a misdemeanor, you will have to get a renewable license monthly for about a year.
this guy in the back says, "ummm, what if you like got a misdemeanor when you were a juvenile? does that count?"
sigh...
speaking of yesterday's pep talk, some classmates were asking about hiring and job placement stuff. my teacher says that he works (when, i have no idea...) at scripps mercy hospital in chula vista. then he says that he recently placed 3 rt's, over there because they were these amazing students, etc, etc... then he says that he doesn't have a lot of boys at that hospital, it's just that these three students were very good, etc..
i say to my friend, "what did he just say?! he doesn't have a lot of boys at scripps? what does that have to to with anything?!"
she giggles, "voice, melissa, voice... he doesn't have a lot of voice at scripps..."
"i heard that," i say.
"bullshit!"
lows:
- unfortunately my financial status is looking like i won't be able to take some time off from school next year and take a vacation with my kids. i was also hoping to go to europe again and see my old hood, if it still exists.
- eating habits have been horrible lately. i have grown very lazy when i don't have the baby goats and pretty much eat only prepackaged food. good thing is, i have a whole new perspective on single people and all my single friends can now look forward to not having to listen to me bitch about how they can/should be eating healthy..
highs:
- maintaining a 3.94 gpa. (see title of post)
- helped a friend find a new, bigger place to move into. she's really excited.
- can't wait to be going to days. i miss the monsters. they make life so much fun. i took D2 to baseball practice today, and he called me back to him for a kiss goodbye.
- the boys love their new venus flytraps, the girls have been helping me grow a garden with green onions, rosemary, basil, and strawberries (of course!)
5 comments:
knowing your prez attended school in Mexico, so I'm guessing he's Mexican, I totally understand the v/b distinction and the y/j distinction. But I thought the v/w interuse was a German thing.
Shogun and I were so enchanted by the willages in Yermany, growing long rows of wines, taking care that each wintage was good...
I miss Germany.
i can understand your frustration in trying to understand this guy.
at work, the students complain all the time about this one math teacher with a majorly THICK spanish accent. he is from columbia and it sounds like he is speaking with marbles in his mouth. imagine this guy trying to teach calculus and geometry...even the spanish speaking kids can't understand his english.
glad to hear that you are an awesome student...a 3.94 GPA? that's definitely something to be proud of...studying and taking care of the chilluns...i don't know how you find the time, but you do and you are doing a great job.
i too am affected by the whole accent thing. trying to converse with my company's programmers over the phone is a gut wrenching experience for both sides:
1. They're programmers. That's the language they're most comfortable in. If they read Thane's Meta-Tab blog they'll feel right at home. Certainly not by talking to a dumbass marketing boy like myself. I think they only care about the code, not the customers who use it. And they think I'm a dumbass who has no clue what it takes to write their programs. And you know what? We're both right.
2. I use funny words, pop culture references and off-color innuendos. They struggle with basic syntax in English. Nothing gets done.
and congrats on your success with the juggling act. don't know how you do it either . . . i have to wake up at 3 in the morning to get what i want done.
it sucks trying to speak on the phone with someone who sounds like 'apu' from the simpsons....
thank you come again!
what's really bad is when my teacher's get cliches totally backwards or not understand when i'm being sarcastic or joking with them...
one of my favorites was when we were in microbiology - we were discussing when HIV officially becomes AIDS...
my teacher says that someone can live with HIV ofr years without symptoms, but once it progresses into AIDS, you're screwed... and i quote:
"it's all a downhill battle from there..."
and then there's my other favorite:
"ok guys, you all need to understand that when push comes to pull, you going to be using blah blah blah..."
Post a Comment